Waiting is one of the most difficult things to do, yet it is the one thing that we do most often. Some of us have planned our whole lives around being married and sometimes that is what makes waiting that much more difficult. First I wanted to share a framework for waiting, then I wanted to share some practical tips that I hope will be helpful.

1.     Your waiting is not in vain. God doesn’t just have us waiting for no reason. He is intentional, so everything he does is purposeful. If it is his will for you to be married he will bring/send someone. He is working, you have to trust him.

2.     You won’t be disappointed-God isn’t going to give us something that we don’t want. I used to have this irrational fear that my husband would be some man that I wasn’t attracted to. Then I’m like why would God do that? He created us with our desires and he knows how were wired. God knows how to meet and exceed expectations. You WILL be disappointed If you do it yourself. I can guarantee that. If you settle you will never get all that God has promised. I’m telling you now that its time to put action behind your faith.

 Wait like you believe he is coming

●      Be willing to earn what you’re asking God for. Changed behavior indicates maturity and maturity equals readiness.

●      Be worthy of the kind of man you’re asking God for. Your character is key.

●      Be a woman that is Godly, you attract what you are, not what you want. And IF you’re able to attract it you won’t be able to keep it.

 Live like you actually believe he is coming

 Your life should reflect that you believe the lord is sending you a man and that he could show up on your door step at any moment. You need to be listening to the voice of God over every other voice. God calls us to live like we know he is coming back soon. The same thing applies here. Believe for your mate. Save the best parts of you for him and vice versa. When we get in relationships that are not God connections we struggle, we run the risk of being damaged, and then having to work that much harder to be whole again.

The biggest thing God asks us to do is believe him. Read the story where Joshua sends Caleb to spy out the land (numbers 13). The people did not believe they could take the land and as a result they literally settled and died where they were. When you don’t believe you can have something you will take anything. You have to let go of what is subpar to get God’s best. If you won’t learn to wait for it there will be nothing to wait for.

I love clothes, handbags, jewelry, and nice things in general. However, luxury typically always comes at a steep price. So how do you afford champagne on a sprite budget? Sadly, no magic will get you around paying for it but I can tell you what I’ve done so that you don’t go broke.

I started purchasing luxury items here and there awhile back. Let me be clear I don’t have everything there is to have. I just happen to own a few things. I built my collection around key pieces that I thought were important for a wardrobe because I knew I couldn’t have everything. When spending large amounts of money like this you have to use wisdom. For example, I had a pair of Louboutins that I wore about 5 times. They were bad, you hear me??? But they weren’t practical at all, they were too dressy to really be worn to work which is where i spend most of my time now. So now If and when I’m going to buy luxury shoes they HAVE to be staples. I.e. black pumps and nude pumps. Depending on how tough you are on shoes you may want to avoid them altogether and just spend the money on a handbag because designer shoes cost designer dollars to repair. Below are some of the key pieces I’ve invested in!

1. I invested in David Yurman because I knew they were classic pieces that would last. David Yurman can be pricey so of course, you could always save for it, but I always use my birthday as an excuse to spoil myself. Plus I’m able to mark every bracelet for a birthday or special occasion. Additionally, these make great gifts so you could always ask your significant other or parents for a bracelet or money to put toward what you ultimately want.

2. Buying on consignment/gently used. When I purchase handbags I use Rebagg. It is my go to site, unlike some of the other sites Rebagg allows you to return a purchase for up to 3 days (sometimes that’s important because you need to lay eyes on what you’re spending hundreds of dollars on). The quality is unmatched and the ratings of the bags are spot on. Every so often they will run a sale so if you can catch that not only will you get an already discounted bag but you will save even more money!

3. Purchasing luxury items on layaway. I have never done this but I have a few friends who have and they love it. It’s a way to have luxury but not go into debt for it. And you can enjoy it even more when its fully paid for.

4. Outlet shopping. Sometimes we forget that designer stores sometimes have outlets. They may not always be close to you but sometimes depending on what you want they are worth the drive. Especially for some David Yurman lol. Just check your area to see if they have any outlets that are local to you.

Do you have any other ways to source luxury items that I haven’t thought of? Let me know in the comments, your girl loves a good discount.

Two months ago I turned 33, 2 years before 35- when pregnancies officially become high risk. I’ve always wanted kids and I’ve always planned to have them. But, the planning is looking a little different these days because at the moment I’m not planning with a husband., I’m now faced with the possibility of planning with a doctor.

There is so much conversation now around women waiting later to marry and using unconventional methods to have kids. I think about it all the time. “Freezing your eggs is like insurance- just in case.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that. Then, on the other hand, I think- “There are plenty of women who get pregnant after 35. In fact, I know women in their early 30’s that are struggling.

I believe that it is God that opens wombs and closes them. I also believe that God gives us wisdom and science as well. To be honest I struggle the most with the idea of having my eggs outside my body. Literally. Call me strange, but I’m paranoid and feel like I don’t know what they are going to do with my eggs once they take them out.

When I weigh the decision in my natural mind, I’m of the opinion that even if I freeze them the success rate isn’t high. Most people freeze upwards of 20 eggs to have one or two make it through the defrosting process (embryo’s freeze better than individual eggs). Then there is the toll it takes on your body (the hormonal changes that you go through). You also have to count the costs associated with freezing them until you’re ready to use them… So many things consider.

Then spiritually, I consider that again, it is the Lord who opens and closes a womb, I remember how many women in the bible were considered to be barren until God moved on their behalf and they became pregnant. I still believe in modern-day miracles.

I don’t have the answer. And as I write this I still haven’t made up in my mind what I’m going to do. However, what I do know is that I am going to examine the motive of my heart behind every decision. If I freeze my eggs is it out of fear? Fear that God won’t come through for me? Fear that he isn’t still working miracles? Fear that if I’m not supposed to have kids and that’s what I’ve always wanted are his plans still not better than my best dreams?

Am I making the choice out of wisdom? Recognizing that God gave us science. And that at the end of the day he is STILL the God that opens and closes wombs. So if I’m meant to have a baby he will provide that to me whether naturally, through IVF or adoption.

I’m just asking questions. I’m leaving room for God to answer! Feel free to comment below. I would love to hear your thoughts!