The Tea on Gossip

Listen, I'll be the first to say I love some good tea lol. If you are unaware of what tea is, it the urban word for gossip, and while I’m not really a huge gossip because I don’t believe in being messy, I do love to be know whats going on. I value discernment and good judgment because it allows me to make informed decisions. So you can see why I always like to be in the know. If I know who and how people are I may make different choices when I’m around them. I may choose to share something or I may not. Or perhaps I may decide not to work with them. That kind of information can be helpful and necessary; and when we have it, we should heed it. However, that is totally different than just discussing people's lives as a past time.

So let me say I’m not here to suck the fun life and especially not out of your girl time but I am here to help you elevate it, and not at the expense of poking fun at someone else’s misfortune. Our time would be better spent discussing our own lives. Sharing our highs and low with our friends. Cheering each other on in challenging situations and inspiring each other to be our best. When the vast majority of the conversation is about other people, we're shortchanging ourselves. God has given us friends as accountability partners. Iron sharpens iron. You don’t sharpen your iron by cutting down others. If you turn the focus of your conversations inward, YOUR life will be changed outwardly.

We need to examine our motive for the conversation we're having. Is there something to be learned in discussing another person's story? And if so, Are we listening from a place of judgment or grace? Is there a way to help the person/thing we're discussing? Have we prayed for them as much as we're talking about them? Is what we're discussing going to be helpful to us personally in any way? More importantly, consider how much time you and your friends are devoting to discussing other peoples’ business. Is that your whole conversation? And if you couldn’t talk about people would you and your friends still have something in common?

The thing we have to remember is that our tongue is the ship that steers our life. It determines the course that we will take. SO your words, whether about your own life or another’s sews something into yours. Would I want someone discussing me the way I’m discussing them? Am I putting them down to lift myself? Perhaps you could consider what work you should be doing? Gossip is the tea you spill that will come back to burn you later. Let’s try hard to be more mindful of what we say. I want you and your friends to have so many personal wins that when you get together that’s the only tea that you are pressed to share.